Humor

Balitang Kutsero By Perry Diaz His Excellency Mr. Yoshihiko Noda Prime Minister of Japan Dear Yoshi-san, First of all, I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for the wonderful hospitality you accorded me on the occasion of my state visit to the “Land of the Rising Sun.”  It was a memorable visit as well as a successful bilateral meeting between our Read More …

Balitang Kutsero By Perry Diaz Nobody is sure if seating Philippine President Benigno “P-Noy” Aquino III during the Open Government Partnership conference next to U.S. President Barack Obama was planned or incidental.  But it certainly gave P-Noy some importance.  Imagine, after Obama refused to meet with him formally three times in the past, here’s P-Noy seated on the left hand side of the most powerful Read More …

Balitang Kutsero By Perry Diaz Some people might question President Benigno “P-Noy” Aquino III’s leadership style but a lot would agree that he’d make a good comedian — Dolphy and Panchito, Tugak and Pugak, Apeng Daldal all rolled into one.  When P-Noy gets himself in a tight spot like making a decision, he morphs into Peenoy, the comedian.  And it works! P-Noy is so good Read More …

Balitang Kutsero By Perry Diaz I received a WikiLeaks recording of the private meeting between Philippine President Benigno “P-Noy” Aquino III and Chinese President Hu Jintao prior to their official bilateral meeting in Beijing during P-Noy’s state visit to China.  The conversation went as follows: Hu:  Good afternoon, President Aquino.  Welcome to China! P-Noy:  Gung hay fat choy, President Hu. Hu:  Huh?  I didn’t know Read More …

The Tall Order By Mon Datol The Philippine Courier Toronto, Canada How many more deaths caused by landslide of stinking garbage would the Filipinos endured before realizing that it is their own calling that killed their loved ones? The recent tragedy in Baguio City where a whole family was buried alive when a mountain of thrash from the top of hill collapsed and covered several Read More …

Balitang Kutsero By Perry Diaz My good friend Joe emailed me the following story: One Saturday afternoon, an aide to former President Gloria Arroyo visited the Bishop of Cebu. He told the Cardinal that President Arroyo would be attending the next day’s Mass, and he asked if the Cardinal would kindly point out the President to the congregation and say a few words that would Read More …

Balitang Kutsero By Perry Diaz At 3:30 AM yesterday, Jinkee roused her husband Manny “Pacman” Pacquiao from sleep, “Mahal, you got a call here.”  “What! Who’s calling me at this hour?” Pacman asked his wife.  “From Paris, with love, daw!  Hoy, who is this woman calling from Paris?”  Pacman replied, “I don’t know, mahal.  I don’t know of any woman in Paris.  Wrong number siguro Read More …

Balitang Kutsero By Perry Diaz Zaldy Ampatuan got a call after he spilled the beans on ex-prez Gloria Macapagal Arroyo.  The conversation went this way: Gloria: Hello, Zaldy. Zaldy: Who’s this? Gloria: This is Gloria.  Remember me? Zaldy: Oh, hi, ma’am.  Of course, I remember you!  How can I forget you?  You still owe me P20 million! Gloria: Hoy, tawad na lang, okay? Zaldy: Anong Read More …

Balitang Kutsero By Perry Diaz Sara called her daddy to tell her that she’s in big trouble.  The conversation went like this: Sara: Daddy, daddy, I’m in big trouble! Daddy:  Why, what did you do my child? Sara: I punched the sheriff! Daddy: What?  Why did you do that?  That’s an assault on an officer of the law!  That’s a crime, hija. Sara: But daddy, Read More …

Balitang Kutsero By Perry Diaz Communications Secretary Ricky Carandang reported to President Benigno “P-Noy” Aquino III.  The conversation went this way: Ricky: Sir, I have good news and bad news. P-Noy:  Why does good news always come with bad news?  Okay, what’s the good news? Ricky: Sir, the warship that you ordered to patrol the Spratly islands is already there. P-Noy:  Very good! And what’s Read More …