Balitang Kutsero
By Perry Diaz
President Aquino and Prime Minister Noda
His Excellency Mr. Yoshihiko Noda
Prime Minister of Japan
Dear Yoshi-san,
First of all, I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for the wonderful hospitality you accorded me on the occasion of my state visit to the “Land of the Rising Sun.” It was a memorable visit as well as a successful bilateral meeting between our two countries.
My tour of the area devastated by the earthquake and tsunami that hit your country caused me a lot of grief because of the displacement of hundreds of thousands of your citizens. But I must say that I truly admire the resilience, perseverance, and discipline of your people in dealing with the catastrophe.
My personal experience of seeing how your government and people handled the recovery and reconstruction in just a matter of one year leads me to believe that where there is hope, there is a way. I went home enlightened and resolved that should my country experience what you had gone through, I’d think of how you did it.
On a personal note, I’m glad that you accepted my pledge of $1 million for the earthquake and tsunami victims as a token of our friendship and sincere desire to help our distressed neighbor in the spirit of bayanihan.
I know that when I made my pledge of $1-million donation, my country was in the midst of Typhoon Pedring, a situation where we could use that money to help our people. But my Christian upbringing taught me: “Give and you shall receive.”
But Yoshi-san, I must tell you that Typhoon Pedring was worse than Typhoon Ondoy two years ago in which your people – through your benevolent government — donated $50,000 to the typhoon victims. And then as soon as Typhoon Pedring left the country in havoc, Typhoon Quiel struck. It was a double whammy!
Should your people decide once again to donate to our typhoon victims, I hope that they would consider increasing their donation because of the magnitude of the catastrophe, which my staff estimated to be at least ten times worse than Typhoon Ondoy. Perhaps a $3-million donation might be something that you would consider. But please don’t think that I’m pressuring you into giving.
If you decide to donate $3 million… or more, you may subtract our $1-million donation and just send us the difference. That would simplify our accounting.
Once again, I thank you, Yoshi-san. I would like to invite you to visit my country, the “Pearl of the Orient Seas.” I must tell you that you and I have something in common. You’re Yoshi-san and I’m a yoshi fan! My favorite yoshi — or cigarette — is Marlboro. We can smoke a yoshi during our tête-à-tête.
Sincerely yours,
Dr. Benigno “P-Noy” Aquino III
President of the Philippines
Japan’s Prime Minister’s reply to the Philippine President:
Dear Busise-san,
You are asking for a mere $3 million? I’ll raise that to $30 million so you can buy yourself a dozen Porsches. That will increase your chances of finally getting a real girlfriend who will, ultimately, become the Philippines’ First Lady.
You see, it’s really important for the leader of a nation to be married. Otherwise, people will think that you are queer, if you know what I mean.
Whatever is left of the funds I’ll send, just use them to buy thousands of cartons of Marlboro cigarettes so we’ll have a lot to smoke when I make my state visit to the “Pearl of the Orient Seas.”
Yours truly,
Yoshi-san
Hahahaha…. Don, that’s a funny letter from Yoshi-san! With that kind of money, Busise-san can have a harem. LOL
magkatotoo sana perry ang three million.
Showing off is what P-Noy did in Japan. Even a little gift of One million the result will come back many millions. Just like a slot machine, one dollar becomes a million, if you hit the jackpot. Investment of one be multiplied many times in returned.
Both countries suffered a natural calamities. Japan got worst due to man made nuclear power plants. Japanese are hard working people technically. Philippines exporting servants of the world as casual laborers. Few professionals and some not working what they finished in college.
We lost more agricultural products in Luzon due to typhoons and floods. Why not developed Mindanao agriculture where typhoons rarely visited especially central and westhern areas?
do you think the government haven’t considered doing some changes in mindanao? Do you think if that’s possible, they wouldn’t done it? I mean, I came from mindanao.
could this letter be real? “Once again, I thank you, Yoshi-san. I would like to invite you to visit my country, the “Pearl of the Orient Seas.” I must tell you that you and I have something in common. You’re Yoshi-san and I’m a yoshi fan! My favorite yoshi — or cigarette — is Marlboro. We can smoke a yoshi during our tête-à-tête.” This statement is so unbecoming.. if it really came from PNoy.